Another day another......

I guess all is well in Santoroland. Tomorrow is my 34th birthday and I am happy to say nothing is going on. I guess you could say I am a bit of a pessimist, but with the roller coaster ride I have been on for most of the last 30 or so years, I have learned to enjoy the rest periods. I know, boring!! But at least nothing bad is happening. Well not to me anyway. That is not to say that life has been uninteresting. Between my surgery and recovery which is going ok (not as good as I would hope but still ok), Suzy's having been put on the insulin pump, and the rest of the clan keeping up their normal high jinks, things are still quite lively. We are hoping to get to take some time off this summer for a much needed vacation. I am not too sure exactly where or when but I think we may try to do a nice long trip to visit various family members, my bro Frank and his family, Suzy's grandparents, Suzy's aunt Linda and uncle Jack and maybe we will squeeze in a little time to ourselves along the way. I know it is still a few months away at least but I am happily looking forward to it. Peace.

Work daze.

Thank goodness I am back working in the office for a change. I have spent the last several months working form home and recovering from my neck surgery, and I was starting to go nuts. I am back in the office and getting back to the routine of daily life surrounded by other people (not just our dogs). I must say I had really enjoyed working at the house and being relaxed on the sofa most of the day, but I guess I was starting to lose touch a little bit with reality. I had started going three or four days without shaving and sometimes almost that long without a shower too. So now I am getting back into the swing of things and feeling better too.
My physical therapist (for my neck problems) has had me doing a bunch of stretching and resistance work that has me thinking more about taking better care of myself. I have been taking some vitamins for a while now (about a year) and noticed that if I miss even a day or two of taking them I really feel the difference in my body. I can honestly say I will be doing my best from now on to keep the appropriate levels of vitamins in my system. For now I am taking one One a day mens, one 1000mg C, one 1000mg B12, and two 500mg Inosotol every day and I feel a lot better for it. I highly recommend it to anyone who just wants to feel better then they do now.

On and on and on and on....

Well still in the collar and now since I have been having pain more like what I was experiencing before the surgery I asked to have my appointment with the doc on an earlier date. Unfortunately the best they could do is one week earlier, and then they said I should stay in the collar the whole time until the doctor could take a look at me and see what the cause of the pain is. So, for now I hope to have the collar off by the end of next week. We will have to see, all I can say is thank god for Loritab.

2 More weeks.

A holiday and the start of a new year have gone by and here I am still in the torture device. Apparently my neck didn't look good enough at my last check up and x-ray so the doctor decided to have me stay in the collar for a few more weeks. I now have 2 weeks till he says I can take it off for real. I can't say how happy I will be to be able to turn my head again, but I am still a little apprehensive. I still have pain in my neck and right shoulder every day, some days are better then others but it can be pretty bad still so I am worried that it won't improve after I take off the cervical collar. I will have to just wait and see how it goes. I know it will take time either way.

5 more days till freedom (sort of anyway)

Yea!!! I get to finally take off (well in a few days) the neck restricting torture device, by that I mean the cervical collar I have been wearing for the last 5 weeks. I know it is important to my neck's proper healing, but I am really starting to get sick of it. I am just happy I didn't have to wear it in the heat of summer (I could expand on that thought but I would rather spare you all the yucky details). Anyway I am looking forward to being pain free for the first time in months. I guess I should add that I feel much better already but the c-collar does inflict its own pain, different from the pain of the damaged vertebral disk, but it seems that that will go away when I am done wearing it. The incision is healing up nicely but is still a little tender so I am trying to not touch it if I can help it.

10 days to go!!!

I can't tell you how much wearing this cervical collar sucks.
Anyway, all is well at the Santoro household, we put up our Christmas tree last night and we are looking forward to a fun party at our good friends Brian and Kelly Pechin's house tomorrow night. My friend Dan posted a funny video today on Facebook and I am posting it here for all to see! It really made me laugh.

Three weeks out

I am happy to say I am feeling pretty good most of the time. I still have a bit of pain but I think it is mostly from the collar itself, and it's resting on my neck. Now I am just trying to stick to what the doc says and keep the collar on all the time, with the exception of showering and a break now and then to wash the pads. I am trying to keep an open mind about it all and and just hang on a few more weeks.

One week later...

Well, here I am still alive and kicking, and working my way through the recovery process. It has been a lot different then I had expected. On the day of my surgery I expected to have to stay the night in the hospital for observation, but they decided that the operation went better then they had expected and I could go ahead and go home just a few hours after the surgery. I was very happy to hear that and I felt pretty good so, home we went. The doctor recommended that I try to do some walking as exercise so I took the dogs for a short walk in the neighborhood. I could tell afterwards that I had overdone it but it was too late to worry about that now. I had a very hard time getting comfortable in bed with the collar on so I did not get much sleep that night. The next day I was really feeling the pain for the first time, I guess I was still feeling the effects of the medicine the day before which was why I wasn't hurting too much. Oh well, lesson learned. I have been much more careful since then to pace myself and pay attention to my body. I am one week into my recovery now with five weeks to go in the cervical collar. I can't wait to see how things work out. I am really looking forward to a life without the constant nagging pain and without the daily need to take medication. I will however be very diligent in trying to maintain a healthier lifestyle all around. Suzy and I have agreed to stick to a better diet, and to getting more exercise. We hope that it will make our lives more enjoyable in the long run. We have also talked more about starting a family soon so we have that to help us towards our goals. I have been blessed with a wonderful wife and family who have really helped a lot in keeping a positive attitude and providing support for us in this rough time. Thank you all for everything you have done for us, from the kind thoughts and prayers to the nice visits and helping out financially. We are very grateful. Below is a link to my PhotoBucket album with pictures from the hospital and afterwards at home, feel free to check them out at your leisure or if you prefer just go to this page http://s195.photobucket.com/albums/z86/C_Santoro/Neck%20Surgery%20Pix/

-peace

Surgery photos

Photobucket Album

Twelve hours and counting...

8am tomorrow I will be counting backwards from one hundred. The way I feel tonight, I wish I was already under. As it is, I am not. I am headed out for a bite, and hopefully early to sleep (if I can sleep anyway) with a 6am wake up time. I don't feel much like writing so I am going to leave it at that. Hopefully I will have an interesting story and maybe some cool photos too, come Wednesday afternoon. Wish me luck!!

Medication.....

I was reminded recently of an old saying, it is easier to sell aspirin then it is to sell vitamins, or some variance of that. I also had a co-worker once who, referring to his wife, always finds it easier to ask for forgiveness rather then permission. I guess they are not the same but they are in the same neighborhood. There is probably lot that can be said about both of these sayings, but I am interested in the perplexing relationship I have with my own medication. I take the pills the doctor prescribes to ease my pain, but now the dosage keeps me awake at night. Staying awake means moving around, moving around means more (or worse) pain to deal with. More pain means more pills, and so on and so on.... So, here I am. Sitting on the sofa, watching whatever I can find on t.v. and trying very hard not to smoke (which in itself is quite a challenge while on the pain meds). This sucks. I am happy to be on the "taking vitamins" side of things now, or am I?? I guess I could argue it either way. As to the other saying I can't understand that one from either side. I suppose that is because I have a relatively unique outlook and experience on that side of things. I am just tired of this current crap storm. I think I am going to go for a drive to keep from going nuts.

Not too much fun.

I had my "pre-op" visit today with the surgeon and the hospital billing folks to make sure they get paid even if I die on the table. They did some basic tests to make sure I am healthy enough to have the surgery. All of it was pretty run of the mill, they drew a few vials of blood and did an EKG, there was one that really sucked though, I am not sure what it is called but it involved them jabbing a needle deep into my wrist, they said it was to access the artery directly where I guess they can get some sort of specific test from the artery blood. Although I don't know what it is for I do know it fucking hurts, I mean it was a little uncomfortable at first while they were actually drawing the blood but then after the needle is pulled out it started throbbing, like someone was smashing their thumb into the under side of my wrist as hard as they can. I guess if this is the worst thing I have to endure then I should be happy but having had this type of surgery before I know that the recovery and the immediate post operation pain is going to suck. Anyway, this is all just conjecture I guess, I am just a little worried in anticipation of the surgery. I am happy nothing has happened yet to further postpone things and they even pushed my actual surgery up a few hours to 8:30am. So if all goes as planned I will be out of surgery/recovery and in my own room by 2pm or so, depending on how long the operation takes. I also spoke to the doc today about the possibility of them snapping a few pix with my camera during the surgery and they seemed to be cool with it, the PA even seemed to be a little excited about it. I am not sure if that is a good thing or if it is weird. My surgery is now scheduled for Nov. 6th at 8:30am at Northside Hospital Forsyth in Cumming GA.

Quite an eventful week.

We had a wonderful experience this week, my brother in law Chris Harrison and his wife Ashley welcomed a new baby on Friday. Taylor Elizabeth Harrison was born October 19th at 2:03 pm. She was 6 pounds 11 ounces and about 18 inches long. Suzy and I are very happy and as this is the first grandchild in the Harrison family there was a lot of excitement at their house. I have a fair amount of experience in this area, having two nephews and another niece in my own family. I will never get over how happy they all make me, the pure and unconditional love experienced always renews my inner feeling of hope. I am once again looking forward to a lifetime of teaching and learning and watching their new world unfold. I am reminded of how happy it makes me and I imagine how wonderful welcoming our own children will one day be. With the holidays right around the corner I am sure this fall will be a lot of fun for all of us. I can't wait. Hopefully I will get to spend time with my brother Frank and his family too, we have not had holidays together in a long time so I think that would be nice.

Am I ready?? Do I have a choice??

I have been thinking more and more lately about being a father. I know that no matter how much I think about it and how much I prepare, I will never truly be completely ready. I guess my recent experiences have made me think more about the next stage of life. I love being around kids, but, I worry that my body won't be able to keep up. Some of the best times of my life were spent being a counselor at C.F. camp, but now I am not sure I could do all the fun stuff I did then. The kids kept us going all the time and that is not to mention all the hard work preparing for the week of camp, fund raising and planning for the next event. I guess I am worried that my medical problems are going to prevent me from enjoying the creation of new memories with my own family. If I am to be a good father I must begin to repair my body now. The pending surgery is not much of a concern to me really, but it will definitely mark the beginning of a new commitment to repairing the rest of my body. I think making my thoughts public (sort of) will help. I have more of a reason to succeed if I make my intentions known. Not to say that I wouldn't try, but if I tell the world I want to be a better, more healthy and potentially stronger individual then maybe I can remember that I have made a promise to myself and I have to keep it. I don't think people would think less of me but I would think less of myself and I don't need that. I need to feel productive, I need to feel that I am more then a worker earning money to sustain my meager lifestyle. I am laboring to become a better man, physically, mentally, emotionally and in society. I am sure that weather or not I am prepared life will go on, I would rather feel happy and satisfied with myself then disappointed.

On to the next episode....

I have harbored a well deserved distrust for the Resurgeon's company, a large local group of orthopedics, neurosurgeons, physical therapists, and the like. After several bad experiences with their Lawrenceville GA location, including but not limited to loosing my M.R.I. film and trying to make me pay for their replacement. So, I was a little uneasy about them being my only "real" option as a replacement for my, soon to be out of business, c-spine specialist. I had my first visit with the P.A. that partners with Dr James that will hopefully pick up where the other doc left off. The appointment went pretty much as I thought it would, taking another x-ray and then reviewing it with me and me giving the P.A. an explanation of it and my M.R.I. films that any radiologist would be proud of. He seemed a little bothered at first that I was telling him what was wrong but after a little chatting and Q&A we were on the same page and I felt much more comfortable. A very nice lady then came in and gave us some options for times and dates for my follow up with the surgeon and the actual date (which is somewhat flexible) for my surgery. If all goes as planned by this time next month I will be the proud (ha ha ha) owner of yet another titanium surgical appliance. In this case they feel that the fusion from my previous surgery is in good enough shape that they will remove the old plate and screws from the 4th 5th and 6th and install the new one at the 6th and 7th vertebrae. I am confident that this will all end with me feeling a lot better and hopefully getting back to some of the activities I love and have had to cut back on lately. I have all my fingers crossed that this goes off without any more glitches.

Oh, on a related note the doc says I absolutely have to stop smoking. The smoking really undermines the bones ability to grow with proper density and they don't want to waste their time or mine, so having very good reason to, I am resolved to do as they ask. Suz and I have been talking about it for a while anyway and this gives us a great motivation to get a move on it. A new baby may also be in our future since quiting smoking was one of our biggest goals before we start down the road to family building. I'll keep updating often (with more good news hopefully).